Rhapsody In Blue

Priscilla Sue Wood, 1967

The title of this blog is “Memoirs of the Brain Damaged” and is based on the title of a 1965 book by Oscar Levant called “Memoirs of an Amnesiac,” which I thought was a very funny and appropriate title for my posts. I had seen Levant on Jack Paar’s Tonight Show, which he had taken over after Steve Allen had created NBC’s late night talk show. Actually, at that time I only got to watch the late night shows during the summer, or whenever I had no school the next day, because I usually had to be in bed by ten. But when I was in the 7th grade Jack Paar left the Tonight Show because of its grueling schedule – at that time it was on 105 minutes (1 3/4 hours), five nights each week – for a weekly Friday prime-time hour at 9pm (Central time). There I got to see him with guests like Levant, Jonathan Winters, Bill Cospy, Woody Allen, Cliff Arquette (Charlie Weaver), and many other.

What I wanted to write today is about my first girlfriend Priscilla Sue Wood. We met just before my junior year in school, where we were both in the band at South Garland High School. She was a sophomore who played flute and she had an older sister, Winifred, who played piano. A year and a half earlier, spring of 1964, Winifred had performed at a band concert in our school playing George Gershwin’s Rhapsody in Blue. One of the records I had played and loved as a child was Gershwin’s Rhapsody, that my parents owned that was on three sides of two 78rpm records – it is a 15 minute song that had to be split onto three sides. I had purchased a copy of that music and tried to learn how to play it every day for many years from the time I had taken piano lessons in the fourth grade.

I had dated a few times before 1966, but that was before I could drive and my parents had to take us wherever my “date” and I wanted to go, so that had only happened two or three times. By the time I met Prissy I had my drivers license and we could do what we wanted. I was even allowed to drive our 1959 Chevy Impala (the family’s first automobile to come with air-conditioning!). We dated throughout my junior year and then I got the opportunity to attend a summer seminar st SMU called the John Von Neumann Mathematics Seminar for Secondary Students, sponsored by the National Science Foundation. It was a six week long program that required us to live on campus, so Prissy and I drifted apart. We had pretty much started breaking up even before that, but being gone through all of June and half of July put the end to our relationship.

A year later I went to college at SMU, but left after just one semester to go to East Texas State University in Commerce. Like her sister, she probably went to SMU – their mother worked there and so they got much reduced tuition. I never saw her again or even spoke to her. I did hear a few things, mostly from my mother who would tell me about her being mentioned in the newspaper. Prissy married someone who shared her musical skills and they worked with Fred Waring’s Philadelphians and at Burt Reynolds’ dinner theatre in Jupiter, Florida. Her husband died young, but I have no way now of finding Prissy – I don’t even know what her late husband’s name was.

I am hoping someone who reads this blog may know how I can get in touch with her, or can suggest how I might find her.

Lists

Toroweap Overlook at the Grand Canyon

Probably the worst injury I have from my brain injury is memory loss. I can still remember things about my childhood and most of the years after that, but I cannot remember much about the five or ten years before the accident. I cannot remember anything about the work that I did in my five years at Callier Center. I cannot remember names, places, US states, cities, TV or movie actors, countries, and lots of things like that.

Through my rehab I have been learning many ways to help me remember. For instance to remember the state of Illinois, where I lived when I worked at State Farm Insurance, I can remember the city of Chicago, a city I have visited several times in my life, both from work and from family vacations (see photo above – not Chicago, but from a vacation.). And when I think of Chicago I can easily remember its state, Illinois. So when I want to remember that state I just think of Chicago. Another tool I have been using are lists. Fortunately I have been doing that most of my life.

As a child I made lists of what teachers I had for each class each year, especially after I got to junior high and high school, where I had multiple teachers each day. Like most boys – and probably girls, too – I kept lists of the people I dated or wanted to date, including when we went out, where we went and of course a rating system for each girl. At first I did this in a printed calender, but eventually bought a “little black book” to keep records of that. I don’t have that list any longer because just before Jean and I were married, I destroyed my black book.

But I kept making lists. About our vacations and the places I traveled for work, all the cars I have owned, all the places I worked, my salaries, the places I have lived, the cell phones I have owned, my bank and credit card accounts, recipes, musical instruments and stereo equipment I have owned, hurricanes I have lived through – eight, many of the people I worked with, went to school with, and from my college fraternity. And for some of these lists I kept pretty good details. For instance my list of cars also has the make, model, year manufactured, dates purchased and sold, whether they were new or used, purchased or leased, paint colors, engine size, cylinders, horse power, even the EPA estimated rating when available, where I bought it and how I disposed of it – sold, traded in, or handed down to my son Evan or my brother-in-law Bill.

Early on I used paper and pencil to make these lists, but in the 1970’s when I started working with computers, I used those to keep my lists. In the 80’s I started using personal computers and in 2003 I got my first smartphone, which I have been using ever since.

All of that was long before my brain injury, so it was easy for me to continue doing that. While I was at the Centre for Neuro Skills (CNS), even though it took me six months before I could remember enough to use my phone, I kept lists of my therapists, neuro rehab specialists, roommates, even the meds I was taking. I also made lists of thing I needed to remember like US states, countries around the world that were in the news, all my bills, my medical accounts – Blue Cross, COBRA, Medicare, Social Security, Fidelity (the holder of my five retirement funds – Oncor, John Hancock, Sabre, Nielsen, Hewlett-Packard), unemployment, and of course the ACA Marketplace (obamacare)!

So as you can see I was prepared for brain damage long before it ever happened. There area still may things I have trouble remembering, but now I have plenty of resources I created throughout my life to aid in my recovery.

It’s a wonderful wife

My beautiful wife!

When I was a sophomore in college at East Texas State University in late 1969, the university changed the way the semesters were scheduled by moving fall semester finals to before Christmas rather than right after. That gave us nearly a month between the end of fall and the beginning of the spring semester. Not wanting to be idle for that time, I wanted to get a job to make a little money. My sister Sande, a sophomore at South Garland High School, and I headed out to Northpark Center which had opened just four years earlier. She immediately found a job as a waitress at Kip’s Big Boy Restaurant, but I did not want to work waiting tables so I applied at all every other non-food shop in the mall – over 150 at that time – and got nothing, even though it was just three weeks before Christmas. Not finding what I wanted, I went back to Kip’s where they hired me to buss tables.

On my first afternoon I managed to drop and shatter a full tray of dishes, relegating me to the kitchen where I spent the next month washing dishes. On the up side, I met one of the best-looking girls I had ever met – Jean Caskey. I asked her out to a concert by Dionne Warwick, but since that was not until February I also took her to see Midnight Cowboy, which had opened that past summer. After we saw the movie I asked if she was REALLY hungry, and when she said yes, I took her to Phil’s Delicatessen, where their burgers were huge.

Since I came home from Commerce every weekend to help my mother with her interior decorating business, I was able to take Jean out those weekends. We dated for two-and-a-half years, getting married August 4, 1972, less than three months after I graduated from ETSU. We moved to Carrollton where I had gotten my first job and eventually bought our first house there five years later. We also were able to do a good bit of travelling. When I worked at Lone Star Gas in downtown Dallas I was able to attend job-related events all over the United States, often taking her with me – Washington, DC; Boca Raton, FL; New Orleans; New York City; Anaheim, CA; Las Vegas; and Colorado Springs. We also made trips on our own to Corpus Christi and Rockport (on our honeymoon), to visit her sister Sue in Charleston, SC; skiing in Colorado; and many other places all over Texas, the US and even Guadalajara, St Thomas, the Bahamas, Canada and Britain.

We both loved to eat, so we have done that both at home and everywhere we traveled. We’ve had Chicago-style pizza in Chicago, muffulettas and beignets in New Orleans, Katz’s Delicatession and Carnegie Deli in New York City, and many great dining experiences everywhere we went.

Jean has been with me through thick and thin. About a year before we were married, I decided to buy a motorcycle and pick her up for lunch at Zuider Zee restaurant, where she worked. On the way there I wrecked the bike, breaking my jaw. Of course she wonedred why I never showed up for lunch – I was in the hospital! Then in Tulsa the summer of 2003 I spent a month in the hospital, along with nearly a year in rehab, from Guillain-Barre syndrome. And, of course, most recently on November 1, 2012, I ended up at Parkland Hospital after being hit by a car, suffering a traumatic brain injury.

Jean has been there to help and support me ;every step along the way. With the TBI keeping me from being able to take care of the bills, for the first time in her life Jean had to take over those chores. I hadn’t meant to keep her in the dark about our finances, she just did not have any interest. Two years ago she and Evan had to dig through my stuff – mostly online because I received and paid bills online whenever possible – to figure out who we owed and how to pay for everything. Jean worked miracles getting me organized and taking care, not only with the bills we already had, but also the new ones resulting from my injury, from medical bills to long term disability and Social Security Disability Income.

I always knew how wonderful she was, but after the past two years, I am truly amazed at what she is capable of doing, for me and with me.

Jeannie, I admire and love you, beyond belief!

Nicole

Words I needed to remember

After I had been attending rehab at the Centre for Neuro Skills for a few months, my counselor Brain asked me this question: “Patrick, thinking about your entire life, what was your best day?” Without skipping a beat I replied, “Today. Today is my best day.”

That beautifully captured my heightened awareness, my excitement and anticipation, that comes with working for a great purpose, the way that such reformation brings spice, meaning and joy to life. Through my recovery process, I have met so many wonderful people and made so many lifelong friends, each new day is always my best day.

On Wednesday January 2, 2013, I was loaded into a van on my wheelchair, and moved to CNS. The first person I met at the apartments was Nicole Douglas-Barclay. She was my neuro rehabilitation specialist. It would be many months before I knew what that was, and several months before I could even remember “NRS.” Since my condition kept me from remembering most names I heard, over the next few months I often had to ask my wife Jean what Nicole’s name was. I could not remember that.

Jean soon became aware during my first couple of weeks at the CNS apartments how important Nicole was to my recovery. So much so that when CNS decided to move me into a different apartment there, Jean asked the powers-that-be at CNS if Nicole could also be moved to be my NRS. That change of location and getting to take Nicole with me at each move continued twice again, allowing me to continue with the excellent care and development that Nicole provided me.

No matter to which apartment they moved me, Nicole and I were together. Life was good for both of us. It is good to be in rehabilitation — when learning again how to read and how to remember names and places, recovering from brain damage nothing is better. Food tastes better. Water is more brilliant. Girls are more beautiful. The sky is bluer. For the brain damaged in recovery. My life was the best. I was the happiest man alive.

What did she do for me? Everything. From the first day she would ask me a series of orientation questions, to help rebuild my memory:

What is your name?
What day of the week is it?
What is today’s date?
What month is it?
What year is it?
What is the name of the rehab building you are in?
What is my name?
What type of injury caused you to be here?
What city are you in?
What state are you in?
What country are you in?
What city are you from?
What state are you from?
What season of the year is it?
What is the weather like today?
Who is the president of the U.S.?
How old are you?
Where were you before you came to see me?
What do you do when we have a fire alarm?
What is the address for the apartment and clinic?

At first I knew the answers to none of these questions. By reviewing them each and every day over the months, my brain began to be restored, one answer at a time.

Nicole also spent time helping me to walk. After just a month I was out of my wheelchair and able to walk on my own. Each evening she would have me walk with her around the apartment complex. It was not far, about two-tenths of a mile, but before long I could walk around it twice, then three and eventually five times – a full mile each evening.

She helped me with my reading. Kimberly, my English teacher, gave me a set of flash-cards of short, basic words to read in order to heal my memory and reading ability (see the photo at the top). Nicole spent hours with me each evening showing me all these words so I could remember how to read.

Nicole, standing behind me at the wedding

Nicole went with me to Evan and Mirjam’s wedding. CNS provided a car and driver (Nicole, who had grown up in Jamaica, had no Texas drivers license) to take us to Garland for the wedding and back. CNS also had various events for the patients, such as going to movies, shopping and local parks. Along with some other patients, Nicole would accompany me on these outings. We went to several movies – the only one that I can remember was 42, about Jackie Robinson, although there were several other movies. We would go to local parks in Irving just to walk around and get to know the other patients and NRS’s. I was strong enough that I could help push the other patient’s wheelchairs around the parks. My shopping trips were limited to Target – because I could only eat through my gastrostomy tube (G-tube) Nicole never got to take me to do any grocery shopping.

What is probably Jean’s favorite task that Nicole taught me was to do my own laundry!

Sadly, CNS has a regulation against NRS’s providing patients any of their contact information, so I have not been able to communicate with her in over a year. Please check out my page about her, and contact me if you know how I can reach her,

Being cared for

CNS apartment kitchen

When I arrived at the Centre for Neuro Skills the afternoon of January 2, 2013, I was first taken to their resident care brain injury living facility (apartments), where I was assigned a room with Bo Lewis of Weatherford. I lived in the apartments from then until July 19, when I moved back home to Garland. There were six neuro rehabilitation specialists (NRS) who worked with us every day, around the clock. Their days started at 7:30 am, when an NRS would come on duty replacing the one who had been there overnight, since 11:30 pm. Patients attended classes at the CNS clinic begining at 9 am, 10 am and 11 am, staying until 3 pm or 4 pm, depending on their rehabilitation needs. Because I did not have any serious physical injuries,  I only went to the clinic from 11 am until 4 pm.

Some of the people I had helping me included Adriana (from Mexico), Ashleh (Irving), Bernadette (Las Vegas), Lareasha (Wichita), Lupe (Irving), Mary (Amish), Shirene (China), Amanda (Texas), Whibelle (Philippines), Kimberly (Chicago), Nicole (Jamaica) and Shantell (Lubbock). I don’t really remember all of their names and home towns, which is why I made sure to write them all down in my phone.

Usually in the mornings our NRS would make sure we woke up on time, showered, dressed, made the beds, straightened up our bedrooms and living areas, had breakfast, prepared our lunch to take to the clinic, and got us to the van which took us to class. The vans were later used to bring these NRS’s to the clinic to help us with our lunch hour. In the afternoons the vans would return to bring us back to the apartments, carrying one or two evening NRS’s to help. Each van had lift devices to load and unload patients in their wheelchairs, as many as three or four in each van. Other patients also had walkers, crutches and canes that needed to be loaded onto the van, not to mention steps and stands to assist us in climbing up into the vans.

These routines varied a lot depending on the condition of the patient. Since I was not able to eat any meals and got mine from a gastric feeding tube, a clinician would come to my room each morning to give me my feeding – which usually took about an hour – before I got up to shower and get ready for my day at the clinic. I would get other g-tube feedings at lunch, dinner and again late at night. Normally the NRS’s would prepare the meals or supervise the patient’s own preparation.

Bathroom time is always stressful when you are restricted to a wheelchair. First of all the doors in the apartment had to be wide enough to allow access, and it was often difficult to aim the chair right to get it through. You also had to park near enough to the toilet to move off the wheelchair, and then push it out of the way but still close enough to reach it  to get back on it afterwords. This kind of maneuvering took a lot of practice, and I would often have to yell for help from an NRS. Fortunately, they would often stand just outside the bathroom door for just those situations. And also because I would often need them to assist in wiping.

Showers were even worse. We had various kinds of seating for use in the shower, and often two different types depending on the patients sharing the apartment. Often I would have to remove my roommate’s shower chair and replace it with my own. This is in addition to what everyone normally has to do, such as making sure you have the soap, wash cloths and towels within reach.

There were a lot of other things these girls – I say “girls” because all the NRS’s I had were female. There were a few male NRS’s, but while I would see them on occasion, I never had one assigned to me. Each day Nicole would ask me a list of about two dozen questions designed to help me regain my mental abilities. These were questions like “where are you, why are you here, what day of the week is it, what is today’s date, what time is it, what’s the name of this place, what’s my name, who is your case manager, who is your residential care manager, what town are we in, what is the address” and more.  At first it was a struggle to answer any of these questions. But over time, I was able to remember most, if not all of them. I still have to check my phone for the month and day, and many of the names of the people I see each day, but it is coming back.

After I no longer needed a wheelchair, Nicole and I would take walks around the campus at the apartments, which was only about 2/10 of a mile. We began with just once around, but over the months that increased gradually until we were often doing four or five laps each day. As I have mentioned, I also did that most days during physical therapy at the clinic, eventually getting up to a couple of miles in an hour. One afternoon at the apartments they wanted to test my ability to find my way around the neighborhood, so another NRS took me on a walk from the my apartment to a nearby store and back, circling several blocks – about three quarters of a mile. The goal was not the distance or the exercise, but to make sure I could navigate my way around the neighborhood and find my way back to my home.

The NRS’s primary function was to help the patients progress toward becoming independent enough to leave the apartments and re-inter the real world. So I learned to do my laundry, plan my meals, do my own grocery shopping, prepare my own meals, clean my room and my stuff, and all the other things that are necessary in life.

We also had activities planned to get us out of the apartments, like going to the movies or nearby parks. I don’t recall doing this while I was in a wheelchair, but some of the other patients were, especially those who would go to a park. We also went to a Texas Rangers baseball game once, and one time a bunch of us were taken in the vans to a bowling alley. This mostly happened in the evenings, but the bowling happened during one class day, with CNS using a couple of their vans to take ten or twelve of us on an excursion to a local bowling alley. We only had enough time to bowl about six frames, but a good time was had by all! We also had parties, at both the apartments and at the clinic, usually celebrating the “graduation” of one or more patients who were finally well enough to leave.

I’ll have to say, the seven months I spent at the apartments of CNS were definitely the best time of my life. I was regaining my health, meeting many wonderful people, and making friends I would keep for the rest of my life.

I’m still learning to read again

My mother tells me that I had learned to read, tell time and use a calendar before I started Kindergarten at five years old. So it was quite a shock when I began awaking from a coma in Zale Lipshy University Hospital and found that I could not read at all. I could not even remember the alphabet. In fact, when shown the alphabet written on a page, I could not even tell you what each letter was.

I was only at Zale Lipshy for a couple of weeks, from December 17, 2012 when I was moved out of Parkland, until January 2, 2013, when I was moved to Centre for Neuro Skills in Irving. At Zale Lipshy I had rehabilitation in reading therapy and physical therapy, along with how to feed myself, bathe and dress myself. I was so angry with myself for not being able to read, I’m sure I was exceedingly disagreeable to the girl who was struggling to help me learn the alphabet again. I wish I could remember her name, just so I could apologize to her. Still, while I was able to make some progress in my physical rehabilitation and life skills, I was still struggling with my reading when I arrived at CNS.

One of the first things they needed me to do when I first arrived was take a number of tests to establish the starting points of my rehabilitation process. The fact that I could not read made this process quite difficult. In addition, the first few days I was there, I contracted something that caused me to be unable to keep any food down. The first morning I arose at CNS, my NRS (Neuro Rehab Specialist) fixed me a terrific breakfast, which i promptly threw up all over the breakfast table. At that time CNS did not have anyone in the apartments during the day to look after patients like me, so I had to go to the clinic. At the clinic I spent my first few days lying on a cot in the physical therapy room where clinicians and therapists would come in and ask me the questions they needed answered, to establish my base line brain skills and memory. During these sessions I would periodically lean off the edge of the cot and vomit into a pan provided for just that purpose. I’m sure I made quite an initial impression on the therapists with whom I would be spending my days over the next year.

Each day at CNS included Speech Therapy, Education Therapy, Physical Therapy, Occupational Therapy, Counseling, Case Management, Nursing, Social Counseling, and lunch. My education therapists consisted of Amy Stalcup, Beth Cook, Julianna Richardson, Maribel and most especially Kimberly Webb (next to me in the photo at the top of this page). Most of the patients at CNS did not enjoy education class; mostly they wanted to get back to being productive, which meant recovering their physical abilities (PT), job skills and learning to drive again (OT). My primary focus was being able to read again. Kimberly saw that and responded by giving me a great deal of attention. Each day at CNS they posted that day’s schedule for each patient, but that schedule only told you which department and which hour you had that course. You had to go to each department’s area in the building to find out with which teacher you were scheduled to meet. Before the first hour each day I would go to the education department to see who I was scheduled with. Usually it was Kimberly, but often, when I was scheduled with someone else, by the time later that day when I arrived for that class, Kimberly had changed the schedule so that she was assigned to work with me. I understood that she did that out of compassion for my need to read, nothing else. But still, whatever the reason, I appreciated her dedication to helping me to read again.

I had the opportunity to experience education classes every day for nearly a year, and it allowed me to get where I can read a little bit. Over that time we worked on helping me to identify the letters of the alphabet, read words, short paragraphs, and other tasks. There was a list of short words that I would read out loud while Kimberly monitored how long I took to read it. As is common with TBI patients, I had little problem with longer words, that are easier to recognize, but had problems with words like WHY, WHO, WHERE, WHEN, IF, OF, ON, IT, IS, etc. At the end of my work at CNS, near the end of last November, my Reading Fluency was at grade 2.3, as measured by the Woodcock-Johnson III: Tests of Achievement.

I still struggle with my reading. When I need to read something, as with a bill or other business letter, I first determine whether I really need to read it at all or, can I skim it, or if I need to highlight, underscore, or circle important words. This applies to emails, magazines, news papers, and anything else I read. Probably my biggest problem is reading signs along the road as they move past me faster than I can read them. I also have a problem at movies when they have subtitles. They don’t stay on the screen anywhere near as long as I need to read them. At least when I watch TV at home, I can pause such things and take the time I need to fully read them. These problems are more nuisances now until I am able to read fast enough again. When life moves too fast, you often learn that you can do without it.

To All the Girls I’ve Loved Before

There are many girls who have been important in my life, each more beautiful than the last. This treatise will not cover two of them – my mother and my wife – because my thoughts about each of them needs much more than a summary like this.

Sande, my sister, helped me in many ways, most especially when I learned to communicate with her and treat her as a friend. We had been the usual rival siblings, fighting with each other, until I got to college and wanted a car. I quickly saw that my parents would not be able to get us each one so we needed to settle our differences and work together. We needed to combine our efforts and find a way to share. Since I did not need a car at school, where I could walk to class each day from my campus dorm room, we decided that she could use the car during the week and I would use it on weekends after I got home each weekend from ETSU. I worked weekends for my mother in her decorating business so I was already making the one-hour trip between home and college each weekend.

It took a lot of effort for Sande and I to agree on a car, but we both compromised a little and settled on a 1962 Chevy Bel-Air (this was in about 1970) that we could both enjoy. This worked quite well and we have been good friends ever since.

Betty Rushing was our neighbor across the street from the time we were both eleven years old. That first winter we both got guitars for Christmas and learned to play. On our first date, at fifteen, I took her to see The Beach Boys at the Dallas’ Market Hall. I say “I took her” but actually, my mother took us there. I don’t remember if my mother went back home during the concert, but she probably just parked and stayed nearby until it was over. As a trivia note the night before that concert in Dallas, The Beach Boys had performed in Houston, after which Brian Wilson had left the tour and gone home to California. Brian was replaced for the remainder of their tour by a little-known studio guitarist named Glen Campbell! Betty and I spent much of our high school years swimming in our back-yard pool, but never really dated except for that concert.

I am posting this blog entry as much to find and reconnect with a few of these girls with whom I have lost track over the years. After I graduated from college, got married and moved away, Betty and I never kept in touch. Last year she passed away from cancer. I never made the time to reconnect with her and I am so sorry about that.

Priscilla Sue Wood is another lady with whom I have also lost track. I was her steady boyfriend during all of my junior year in high school. We were in the band together and met there.

Laurie has been an extremely accomplished singer throughout her life, and we got to work together through music from the time I was a senior in high school. While we spent quite a lot of time together with our music, I only dated Laurie once, but not for my lack of trying. I asked her out many times, but she always had other obligations or excuses not to go out with me. Since I moved back to Garland in 2007 Laurie and I have managed to stay in touch and even play a little music together on occasion.

I worked with Loretta Sue (Mayberry) Beard, for a few years while I was working at TJM Corporation (1973-75), a company that sold printed business forms. Her job was designing custom forms for our customers and she taught me how to design and build those forms, too. We would often have lunch together, either at my desk or at nearby fast food places, talking and sharing our lives and goals. As usual, we lost touch, but I did know that she married a guy from Pittsburg, Texas, and moved there to have a family.

I met and worked with many people during my years with Lone Star Gas/ENSERCH Corp/Enserch Exploration, Inc. (1977-1994). One of my roles there was working with newly hired employees to learn and understand our systems and methods. Nancy Reeves was one of those lovely ladies, both with LSG and continuing at ENSERCH. When she got married to Trey Reeves, I was her friend and the photographer of their wedding. After they were married, they moved to Plano, but I have since lost touch with them.

Kristine Charlotte Blackmon, nee Clement, worked with me at Enserch Exploration and Lone Star Gas from 1980 to 1992, when she went to work at American Airlines in Fort Worth. One of my life-long difficulties at every job I had was not staying focused on what I was supposed to be doing. Kris was very helpful making sure I stayed on track. We became close friends and learned about IBM personal computers during those years, working with Lotus 1-2-3, IBM DisplayWrite, The Forbin Project’s Qmodem, and many other business apps. After we no longer worked with each other, I tried to phone her each year on her birthday, but now, while her phone number still rolls to voice mail, I have not received any replies for a number of years. I hope she calls me back sometime.

I worked closely with Marga Chavez at Enserch Exploration during the 1980s and even went to visit her near Houston about twenty years ago. She was the secretary in the department I worked in and was the only office assistant I knew who worked hard enough to get promoted to analyst. We have managed to keep in touch over the years.

I met Kayoko “Miki” Benesh online when I worked as webmaster for Whoopi Goldberg (Whoop, Inc, aka whoopi.com). Miki would email me asking about Whoopi because she was such a huge fan, even though she was from Japan. Kayoko met Darek online, and are now married with three precious children. We still keep in touch and in 2006, when I was in Chicago on a business trip, I met her and her husband for a tasty lunch at a Japanese restaurant.

While I was at the Centre for Neural Skills in Irving in 2013, one of my first Neuro Rehabilitation Specialists (NRS) was Nicole Douglas-Barclay. Over the seven months that I lived in the rehabilitation apartments owned by CNS, I was in four different apartments. Nicole was so helpful and so dedicated to her profession that my wife requested from CNS management that Nicole also be moved to work with me in each of those four apartments. Nicole helped me in all areas of my rehab, exercising my skills at reading, memory, telling time, walking, remembering names and places, how to do my own laundry and even flossing! I would never have recovered as much as I have without her persistence in working with me. I only hope that someday she will contact me via email so I can thank her for how much she helped me.

There are many other girls who have been instrumental in my life: there were dozens I dated in school and many other friends I’ve had over the years, including Sara Harris, Margo Menconi, Sandy Paige, Shirley Smith, Karen Lee Finlay, Erin Noll Halovanic, Ronda Tyson, Michala Christianson, Christine DiPinto, Theresa Haralson, Shirley Seydel, Sarah Hawthorne, Kim Knapp, Angie Miller, Kay Perry, Karen Richards, Linda Sommerville, Sheila Willson, Bonnie Wright, my son Evan’s beautiful wife Mirjam, and many, many more.

To all the girls I’ve loved before
Who traveled in and out my door
I’m glad they came along
I dedicate this song
To all the girls I’ve loved before

To all the girls I once caressed
And may I say I’ve held the best
For helping me to grow
I owe a lot I know
To all the girls I’ve loved before

The winds of change are always blowing
And every time I try to stay
The winds of change continue blowing
And they just carry me away

To all the girls who shared my life
Who now are someone else’s wives
I’m glad they came along
I dedicate this song
To all the girls I’ve loved before

To all the girls who cared for me
Who filled my nights with ecstasy
They live within my heart
I’ll always be a part
Of all the girls I’ve loved before

The winds of change are always blowing
And every time I try to stay
The winds of change continue blowing
And they just carry me away

To all the girls we’ve loved before
Who traveled in and out our doors
I’m glad they came along
I dedicate this song
To all the girls we’ve loved before

Songwriters – Albert Hammond & Hal David